The Teams of the IFA

All Owners: Feel free to contribute the story behind your team name(s)! [e-mail commish]

The IFA (and the LONAW before it) has had its share of interesting and unusual team names. This list includes some of them, with (perhaps) an explanation of their origin.

Ghost Dogs (2003) - "If a warrior's head were to be suddenly cut off, he should still be able to perform one more action with certainty." [imdb]

Gold Diggers (1998 - ) - Owner T. Wilk reports: "The Gold Diggers movies were done by Warner Bros. back in the 1930s. They did one every other year, in 1933, 1935, and 1937, plus a fourth set in Paris [imdb]. The titles stayed the same every time, with just the year or location changing: 'Gold Diggers of … FILL IN THE BLANK.'

Also, when IFA started, I had just started collecting movies starring Dick Powell, the current Digger head coach. (Out of 54 movies, I only need three more to complete the collection.) So, given that NFL players and owners are greedy bastards, and given the interest in old movies at the time, Gold Diggers stuck.

"We're in the money!"

London Jets (1998) - In some early episodes of the BBC show Red Dwarf [official site], Dave Lister, three million years in the future and the last human alive, espouses his admiration for his favourite Zero-G Football Team, the London Jets. The most famous player on the team, of course, was Jim Bexley Speed (also known as "Roof Attack"), and the London Jets of LONAW played their home games in Jim Bexley Speed Memorial Stadium.

Manhattan Projects (1999) - Apart from the atomic bomb reference, this name was taken from the name of a Thunderball team. For more information on the wildly violent sport of Thunderball, check out the website for the American Thunderball Federation or see episode 310 of the Upright Citizens Brigade TV show.

Michigan Braless Wonders (1998 - ) - Presumably, the name comes from the Seinfeld episodes in which Elaine's nemesis, Sue Ellen Mishke, is featured. Personally, I admire her whole free-swinging, free-wheeling attitude. [edit this]

NC Rangers (formerly Cameron Park Rangers (2004 - ) - Owner S. Watkins moved back to the Raleigh, NC neighborhood of Cameron Park, and he named the squad after the human term for the Anla'Shok. The name of the team is the Rangers, and not the Park Rangers. For those familiar with the area, the Rangers' home, Lennier Field, was built on the site of the demolished Velvet Cloak Inn.

Raleigh Pumas (2001) - During the off-season, owner S. Watkins moved from Madison, WI to Raleigh, NC, so he moved is team there as well. He picked the Pumas as the mascot because he figured it would be easy to alter the logo of the shoe company.

Sons of Geyser (1999 - ) - For some reason, I am thinking this name has something to do with swine insemination. [edit this]

Tenacious E (2002 - ) - Presumably based on "Tenacious D." [official site] [edit this]

Tokyo Iron Chefs (2000) - If memory serves, owner S. Watkins was all excited about the TV show Iron Chef [official site] at the time he was making this team. Whose football will reign supreme? The heat will be on!

We Some Head Bustas (2004) - Owner R. Brown reports: "This name was taken from the chorus of a rap that appears in the video game 'EA Sports Fight Night Boxing' (with Roy Jones on the cover). It has a real animated beat and rowdy lyrics. Since I was addicted to the game and I could hear it playing in my head, and since I chose an aggressive draft strategy, I thought it was perfect. Head Busta is quite synonymous with hard hitting linebackers ... by the way, I have 3 of the best in the business on my team.

"We some head bustas, we some head bustas.....we'll knock a hater out, we some head bustas!"

Wipeouters (2002) - P'twaaang!!!